the woes of a working mom

“you’re a stay-at-home mom, right? Or do you work?”

I’ve been getting asked some variation of this question more and more lately, and I’m not entirely sure why.

Is it because I’m constantly driving my kids to school, swim lessons, social outings, and appointments?

Or maybe because I am never not wearing workout clothes, a dead giveaway that I’m not heading to an office at any point.

Whatever the indication is that I never leave my house (they’re not wrong), I try not to take offense at the insinuation. Although - why would I be offended? I’ve been a stay-at-home mom since my oldest was 6 months old, and what a blessing it has been for our family the last 5.5 years.

It has certainly presented unique, unexpected challenges, and I won’t lie - there are times when I think being a full-time working person out of the home would be easier than staying home.

But, as all the songs, poems, and Instagram captions remind us… these are the days.

these are the days that I:

• Wake up at 5 am before my kids (most of the time) to get a little bit of work done

• Work after they go to bed, fighting sleep after 8 pm (tell me it’s not just me… anyone?!)

• Occasionally (read: daily) feel guilty for enrolling my son in daycare just so I can work/ have time alone

• Regularly feel guilty for turning on a movie for my kids so I can get work done

• Question my choices as a mom and as a freelancer/ business owner

• Struggle to prioritize. “Should I be playing with them, or should I be getting work done?” - me to me, every day

working is hard, being a mom is hard, and doing both is hard. I am constantly shifting and changing my perspective as my kids’ needs change and as my workload ebbs and flows.

Just a reminder to all the moms out there — we show our kids empathy and grace every day. don’t forget to save some for yourself, too.